Saturday, April 12, 2014

Monday Problem: I'm concerned about the Father's behavior

Disclaimer: all emails are abbreviated and edited for clarity. When you submit to The Nanny Time Bomb please note that there will be edits. All names and info kept confidential. 

Dear Nanny X,

I deal with many kids who literally fear their father due to his parenting style. Knowing I'm just the nanny I know I can't overstep his authority, but I fear that his authoritative style will scar the children and come out later in their lives to tragically affect the kid's relationship with their father.


Dear Anon,

I sympathize with you. Many of us - as nannies - come across behavior in parents that is questionable. The point is, that unless a definitive line is crossed - actual witnessed physical violence or witnessed habitual verbal and psychological abuse - our hands are tied as our society grants parents absolute power of authority to administer the form of care they deem fit. 

Keep an eye on things though .. while we are caregivers in the background - we do have a responsibility to be the eyes of the State. If you think an employer has crossed a line you have every right to disclose that abuse. 

Nanny X

Wednesday, April 9, 2014

British Prince George's new nanny and gorgeous new pix of the little Royal ...

Here it is! Our first official look at Maria, Prince George’s new nanny. Plus some adorable close-up photographs of the little royal chubster himself.

SOURCE: Getty Images;

Saturday, March 29, 2014

18 years of school, and now I'm an over-educated nanny

By Emily Koss

"Emily, would you please put a bowl of water on the floor so I can drink like a dog?"

It was a sweet and funny request, and I was happy to do it. But it was also a reminder, once again, that I work for a 4-year-old.

You've probably heard about the vast array of problems facing my generation as we graduate and attempt to enter the job market. As a 24-year-old recent college grad, I can tell you that what you've been hearing is true.

I graduated last May with unpaid internships waiting for me in Mexico, Spain and Nicaragua. Even more exciting, my research proposal had been accepted, and I was all set to go to Namibia for three months of studying baby baboons. I had a passable GPA, a kick-ass resume and a nagging worry that all was for naught.

"To study the social and behavioral sciences is a labor of love," my professor told our graduating class, "because you aren't in it for the money!"

And sure enough, after an incredibly frustrating and depressing series of failed attempts to find funding for my research projects, watching my would-be departure dates slip by one at a time, I finally took a job as a nanny.

Don't get me wrong: I love the little girls I care for beyond reason, and I learn things from them every day. It's just that this wasn't what I envisioned for myself as I slogged through 18 years of school.

I'd probably feel worse except that I have so many friends and acquaintances in the same boat. I know a psychology graduate working at Home Depot and a business grad who is a receptionist in a hotel. Several of my fellow anthropology grads work for a catering company.

According to the Pew Research Center, I am part of the first generation since the Depression to have higher levels of poverty and unemployment than the previous generation at the same age. More than a quarter of us still live with our parents, and only 30% think of our current jobs as careers. And yet, we are the best-educated generation in American history.

My best friend, Annie, fantasized throughout college about going to law school and becoming the next Wendy Davis. But after reading the statistics on how many law school graduates don't find work in the field, the thought of borrowing another $150,000 to pursue a law degree seemed daunting. She landed an unpaid internship at Planned Parenthood, which she liked a lot, but she recently had to quit to make more time for her job that actually pays (marginally) as a preschool teacher.

It used to be that a "day job" was something artists, musicians and writers did while working on their creative projects and waiting for their breaks. Now most of my friends have day jobs. We work to pay the bills but also to support volunteering at things we hope will lead to more satisfying work in the long run.

But even good day jobs are harder to land than they used to be. When I was in high school, I worked at Trader Joe's. The pay was good, they treated me well and there was plenty of room for promotions and raises. I came home every day happy and tired. Because I hated school, this led to many arguments with my parents about why I needed to do my homework.

"I love Trader Joe's!" I told them. "I don't need school. I can just work there forever!"

"You will get bored with Trader Joe's," they insisted. "And then what?"

This is how they explained it: If you go to college, you can do whatever you want with your life. You can work at Trader Joe's if you want, but you'll have other options too. If you don't get a college degree, your life will be a series of dead ends.

They thought they were telling the truth. In their experience, and the experience of their parents and grandparents, this had been the case. Education was the answer for improving one's status and expanding opportunities. And now, for the first time in the history of America, it isn't. And we, the first generation having to confront this new reality, have no idea how to make ourselves employable.

After graduation, I reapplied at Trader Joe's, but I didn't get rehired. Such jobs, which offer benefits and mobility, are highly coveted now, and the competition is intense. And so I work as a nanny.

A few days ago, the 6-year-old sister of my 4-year-old was sitting at the table complaining about having to do her homework. She whined on and on, but I remained firm: "You must study hard," I said, "so you can grow up to be a nanny!"

Emily Koss is a nanny living in Glendale.

Wednesday, March 19, 2014

Is this the end of the British Nanny?

By the Daily Telegraph, UK

Foreigners are not burdened with that marvellous sense of entitlement that has made so many of our young people obnoxious and unemployable. Samantha and David Cameron have one from Nepal. The Duke and Duchess of Cambridge have just employed one from Spain who is “married to her job”. Is the foreign nanny merely cheap labour for “the wealthy metropolitan elite”, as immigration minister James Brokenshire has sneered, or does she have attractions that can’t be matched by young British women? I may have the answer.

When the children were very small, we had a terrifying nanny. Terrifying to us, that is, not the children. Hayley had previously worked for a wealthy family where, so I learnt, she had felt exploited. This proudly bolshy Brit arrived at our decidedly modest abode with a sackful of bristling grievances, and several demarcation zones.

For instance, Hayley was prepared to clear the children’s breakfast things and load them into the dishwasher, but she refused to pick up so much as a toast plate used by Himself or me. One morning, I got up early to make a meat sauce and I asked Hayley if she could possibly put on a potato topping so the whole family could have it for dinner.

Eight hours later, I got home to find that half of the meat sauce – the children’s half – had been covered with mash. The other half was just as I had left it, which gave the dish an oddly experimental look. It was all pie and no cottage.

In private, Himself and I laughed at Hayley’s jobsworthness (it was in grim contrast to our easygoing generosity – or cowardice, as I now see it). But we never dared challenge her. Hayley was the Bob Crow of nannies. In her view, washing up her employer’s coffee mug would have been a grievous breach of her job description, and quite possibly her human rights.

As the time passed, Hayley did less and less, apart from arranging her busy social life on her phone, but the children loved her so I let things be. Eventually, at a time of maximum inconvenience, and refusing to stay an extra week to take us up to the start of the Christmas holidays, Hayley left for greener pastures and a nanny car.

Did I take the opportunity to tell her how deplorable I found her attitude? Did I point out that she had repeatedly taken advantage of our absurd good nature? Er, not exactly. Reader, I gave her a flatscreen TV.

Himself was delighted to see the back of Hayley, whom he compared unfavourably with Mrs Ceausescu, but I wept and remained our nanny’s humble servant till the last. Coming from a background where people tended to work as domestic help rather than employing it, I was painfully ill-equipped to deal with the social unease that such an arrangement provokes.

“God, I would never employ a British girl. Too much like hard work,” sniffed a Sloaney friend who went to the same school as Samantha Cameron and the Duchess of Cambridge. Instead, she had a Filipina nanny who was unbelievably loving with the children and glided about the house as though on castors. The Filipina knew she was staff and my friend was her boss. The boundaries were clear. There was no faux matiness. No emotional minefield to negotiate. No need to be prostrate with gratitude at the end of each day because the nanny had carried out the job you were paying her to do.

It would simply not occur to Filipina nannies to leave a toast plate festering in the sink all day because it had been used by an adult not a child. Unlike Hayley, they are not burdened with that marvellous sense of entitlement that has made so many of our young people what they are today: obnoxious and unemployable.
Back in January, the British Chambers of Commerce lamented that home-grown youth are woefully unprepared for the world of work. Attitudes, it said, were an even bigger problem than aptitudes.

Yes, we had noticed. One colleague recalls how her first nanny would solemnly take a “lunch hour” every day, settling down with a cuppa and a magazine while her two tiny charges – one just nine months old – would be left to their own treacherous devices. While a lot of foreign girls still grow up in large families, learning to take care of its younger members, the only thing many British girls form a meaningful attachment to is their mobile.

And just in case you think this is Lady Muck bitching about them below-stairs, I should point out that, after paying her generous salary, tax and National Insurance, I was left with considerably less than Hayley every month. That is the price paid by many working mothers, particularly in London and the South-East, where childcare is the most expensive in the world. James Brokenshire may think we hire foreign help because it’s cheaper, but what we are buying is a work ethic and helpful demeanour which sometimes feels endangered in these isles.

A study by Manchester University, published this week, reveals that immigrants to Britain are better qualified than the existing population. Even indigenous youngsters who have passed their exams can leave something to be desired. Take Gemma Worrall, 20, the beauty salon receptionist, who caused a Twitter storm with her thoughtful intervention on Ukraine: “If barraco barner is our president why is he getting involved with Russia, scary.” Gemma claims to have 17 GCSEs.

A better education system is another reason parents I know of William and Kate’s age are favouring Latvian, Lithuanian, Turkish or Spanish nannies to take care of their princes and princesses.

After Hayley’s graceless departure, we employed an Australian and then a young woman from Cork. They brought a no-worries, can-do attitude which was balm to the soul. I didn’t feel embarrassed asking them to do things. Quite frankly, working mothers have to deal with enough guilt leaving our children.

Since then, I have struck lucky with two home-grown helpers who, now that the kids are older and we don’t need childcare, remain a beloved part of our extended family. They were great. Sad to say, though, it’s now far easier to find dedicated, cheerful hard-workers among immigrants than Britons. Is it any wonder that, today, Mary Poppins is more likely to be Marina Poppova or Maria Poppalos?

Thursday, March 13, 2014

Nanny who found missing Brooklyn boy thought of Avonte Oquendo

By Kerry Burke AND Ginger Adams Otis / NEW YORK DAILY NEWS

Her timing was perfect.
The sharp-eyed nanny with a heart of gold who rescued Kareem Granton from his five-day subway adventure was rushing to work when she spotted the grimy 11-year-old asleep on the 5 train.

“I saw him as soon as I got on. He was lethargic, he was dirty, he was sleeping,” said Alana Joseph, 41, who boarded at the Newkirk stop in Brooklyn at 7 a.m. Monday.

Alana Joseph, of Brooklyn, discovered Kareem Granton on a subway Monday, and took a photo of the child on her cell phone after recognizing him from a TV alert.

“I wondered what this boy was doing on the train at this hour, in this state,” she said.

Joseph, who cares for a 3-year-old and an 11-month-old in Manhattan, had another child on her mind as she stared at the disheveled figure across from her.

Kareem Granton, 11, is reunited with his mother Precious, 26, (left) at the ACS Offices in Brooklyn after going missing since Wednesday.


Kareem Granton, 11, is reunited with his mother Precious, 26, (left) at the ACS Offices in Brooklyn after going missing since Wednesday.

“Do you remember Avonte Oquendo?” she asked the Daily News on Tuesday. Avonte, an autistic 14-year-old, left his Queens school Oct. 4 — and vanished. The teen’s mystery was solved three months later, when his remains began washing ashore at College Point. Joseph, whose 10-year-old son, Raf-Jahzeel, suffers from autism, said Avonte’s sad story is ever-present. Then TV viewers were asked to be on the lookout for Kareem, of Brooklyn.

“I said to my son, ‘Let’s say a prayer for him. Let’s say a prayer that he gets home safe to his family,’ ” she said.

Minutes later, she became the answer to her prayer.

Alana Joseph snapped photo of missing Kareem Granton Monday on 5 train leading to his safe return. Granton ran away from home last week because he did not want to clean up after his dog.

Alana Joseph snapped photo of missing Kareem Granton Monday on 5 train leading to his safe return. Granton ran away from home last week because he did not want to clean up after his dog.

When he sat up, his hood came off and I recognized him,” said Joseph. She snapped the boy’s photo and ducked onto the platform looking for a cop at every station. At Union Square, she told the conductor, who held the train while Joseph found K-9 cop Dennis Grimm.

“I said that there was a missing child on the train and to please hurry up before it left,” she recalled.

After spotting Kareem Granton, Alana Joseph reported it to New York City police officer Dennis Grimm and K-9 dog named Dakota at the Union Square subway train station.


After spotting Kareem Granton, Alana Joseph reported it to New York City police officer Dennis Grimm and K-9 dog named Dakota at the Union Square subway train station.

Standing with his mom, Precious Granton, 26, outside a Brooklyn police station, a sheepish Kareem said he’d taken off because he didn’t want to do his chores.

“I knew my mom was looking for me,” said the intrepid boy who survived on $10 his stepdad had given him. “I’m all right. I just had a little tour out in the world.”

Sunday, March 2, 2014

Psychic nanny' claims to be world's only woman who can help children that see GHOSTS

Single mother Denise Lescano is a much needed support for parents of children who show worrying signs of having a sixth sense

This woman claims to be the world's only psychic NANNY and helps children who see ghosts come to terms with their sixth sense. The single mum from Florida, US, has become a lifeline for parents worried by their children's interaction with the supernatural.
Denise uses her psychic abilities to 'speak to' the spirits and instructs families on how to approach life beyond death. Denise, who believes she has been psychic since the age of nine, said: "My biggest mission in life is to get rid of the fear around what I do.
"This is not a scary thing, this is a very healing and comforting thing.
"Many of the families that come to me, they really don't even believe in me they are skeptical.
"When I am able to help them and really pinpoint what is going on, it is incredibly validating and relieving for the family."
Often Denise is called to determine whether youngsters are seeing spirits or displaying signs of mental illness. She said: "I've has cases where schools want kids put on medication because they think they are hallucinating.
"Sometimes the parents don't know how do deal with their children's abilities."

But other times parents turn to her for guidance on dealing with their own psychic kids.
One such case is Greg, 40, and Heather Howell, 38, from Naples, Florida, who were looking for answers about their son's unusual behavior.
Four-year-old Elijah correctly predicted Heather's miscarriage and that she would later have twin boys, leading her to believe he had a special gift.
Heather said: "Elijah has always been a gifted child - he was speaking in full sentences by ten months old and talked about people who only he could see.
"While I was pregnant Elijah said, 'Mummy, your baby is going to go with God'.
"I said 'Don't say that Elijah, don't say things like that', because I was scared because he knows things.
"I did miscarry a couple of days later and he kept stroking me and telling me it was gonna be ok.
"A while later he said, 'Don't worry mummy, you're gonna have two babies and they're two boys', and in my head I thought he just wanted brothers.
"Months later we ended up finding out we were having twins - and that they were boys."
During her visit with the family Denise communicated with Heather's dead grandparents to get to the bottom of the mystery.

She said: "Elijah's grandfather said he was looking over Elijah and asked me to communicate that he was around.
"His grandmother was the one who delivered the message about Heather losing her baby and that she would have more.
"Elijah displays all the signs of being a a very gifted child with the ability to connect with the spirit world.
"He has a very strong sense of having lived before and speaks of past lives."
Denise also spoke with Heather's late grandfather, Papa Emmanuel, who told her to ask about Heather about 'the butterflies'.
Heather said: "We had a really special day at the park where Elijah had all these butterflies around him and we took a picture.
"Denise explained it was my grandfather's way of telling us he was still with us.
The super nanny also left Heather instructions for handling Elijah's interaction with the sprit world.
Heather said: "I feel much more at ease now after Denise's visit, she's given us a lot to think about.

"We're all looking to Elijah to see how his gifts develop and can't thanks Denise enough for sharing her gift with us."
As well as working with families, Denise has spent years helping police solve murder and missing persons case using her psychic ability.
She said: "A good deal of my work is connecting with people that have past over through sudden death and helping give the family peace and closure - and sometimes answers."


Nannies - have you ever had spooky encounters with kids?